This week on Uncivilized Behavior: Our word of the day is abcedarian, old people, things that scared us as children, various vomit inducing Would You Rathers, introducing a new segment called Missed Connections as presented in our very special way, dirty jokes, insulting people who back into parking spaces, and Jerry is left behind at the end of the show.
Also, please say hello to our new sponsor: Cocktails With Punch! Click on the link on the right side of our website to see what it’s all about!
PS: Josh didn’t say the word of the day…
Here are the show notes if anyone cares:
– Our Weeks
– How does our government function?
– Vehicular homicide (car troubles)
– Workin out like a mother fucker
Word of the Day
-abecedarian- a beginner in any field of learning.
– Old People (Again)
– Being “labeled”
– What scared you as a kid
– Poopy time fun shapes!
Would You Rather…
-Get a root canal by a blind dentist with Parkinson’s disease (you have to sit through the entire session no matter how long it takes)
Go through a three month intensive anal canal and anus stretching process (the end result being a grapefruit sized cavity)
– Nail your penis to a 2×4 from the head of your dick, to the base of the shaft with a series of coffin nails (making sure the nail is protruding from the other side of the board)
Be skinned from your elbows to your fingers and knees to your toes and thrown into a vat of salt while listening to “Uptown Girl.”
– Have your testicles pushed into your pelvic cavity till they tear through your intestines and come popping out of your ass, dangling like two pathetic nuggets.
Have your teeth ripped slowly out of your head with pliers, then the teeth are turned around and shoved back into your head reversed.
– Take a straw, sip up and swallow all the thick crusted saliva straight from the mouths of all the residents of an elderly person’s care home (doesn’t matter if the clientele have expired in their warm little stained old people beds)
Have a transient defecate into your anus, transferring the stool into your body, which you are required to keep inside you for the duration of the next three days.
– Drink a months worth collection of vaginal juices from B. Arthur from the Golden Girls
Be gang banged by crazed chimpanzees with rabies
Riff Raff (Part Duex)
– Anonymous (Hacked CBS.com)
– Newt Gingrich wants Moon Colony by 2020
– News headlines/ common wording, etc…
Riff Raff (The Third)
– Dirty Jokes (Peter Pumpkin Eater) – I got a lot of them [in my pocket]
– PG-13 movies… “make it fuckin R-rated!”
– The Fench – I hate them… damnit
Insult of the Week!
– This goes out to … People who back into parking spaces: You pretentious sons of bitches. Those of you who feel the need to back into parking spots while holding everyone else up. If you can back it in the first place then why not fucking back out?! Someone as inconsiderate as you should have a hot muffler shoved into your anus releasing methane gases through a tube and leading back into your mouth. You should be used to it since your head is always stuck up your own ass. And you drive your damn car like a fucking boat. Slow and stupid. If you can’t handle your vehicle, then buy a smaller one. You people act like your driving a shuttle bus. I can’t stand your old person, ricky tick bullshit. It amazes me you can get up in the morning and remember to breath. Same goes for you stupid cunts with your bug eye sunglasses, texting and looking like a stuck up bitch. I hope a transient cuts your face so it reflects your worthless insides.
Either way you look at it, backing into a space is a waste of time and counter productive. It takes just as much time! If you pull forward to the next space and you are parked, ready to go, kudos to you, but if you waste our god damn time backing up into a space with your display of inadequate motor skills, spare us the stupidity. The fact you exist is enough in this world.
From all of us, to the worthless you, Fuck You!
– Thoren plugs
– Jerry Plugs
– Josh Plugs
– Google +
– Goodbyes and super fun surprise